Discuss
Discuss
It can help to discuss how the break-up is going to work. If you have been living together, discuss who will move out and when. If you have any joint possessions how will you split them? Will there be any contact? Talk together about what will happen if you are both going to the same event, party, friend’s house or meeting. Will there be a time when you can be friends? How will you let the other know if one of you starts to see someone else? These are difficult conversations to have but the clearer you can be the easier the break-up will be for both of you.
The worst thing you can do is to give false hope that you may get back together again one day if that is not true. The truth can hurt but lies can hurt even more. I have heard too many stories of people who have told their boyfriend or girlfriend that they just don’t want to get married at the moment or aren’t ready for a big commitment, and then four months down the line they are engaged to someone else.
If I had to sum up my advice for splitting up well it would be: be kind, be clear and be firm. Ending a relationship is never going to be a pleasant experience but if you can keep those three things in mind it will hopefully lessen the pain for you and for the other person.
If you are reading this and have a story of how not to end a relationship or any tips on how to do it well, please do include them in the comments section below. It would be great to hear about your experiences.